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The impotence is the inability or difficulty getting or maintaining an erection of the penis by interference in vasocongestion preventing penetration during intercourse.

A distinction is usually made between primary impotence, when the man has been able to perform either vaginal or rectal penetration; and secondary impotence, when he has been able to penetrate at least once.

We cannot classify as impotence difficulties in erection that occur as isolated episodes.

These can be caused by fatigue, distractions, emotional tension, alcohol consumption or other factors.

On many occasions impotence can be associated with some couples, specific situations, certain contexts …

For this reason, many men who suffer from impotence put the blame on another person who is usually their partner.

At first it seems to have its logic. “If sometimes I can and sometimes not, the problem is not with me.” The most immediate consequence of this approach is the delay in going to the specialist for help. Delaying this meeting makes it difficult to find, if the origin were psychological, the precise cause of the dysfunction.

Causes of impotence

Impotence can have a physiological basis that prevents the blood stream from building up, producing an erection. In this case, problems always arise, regardless of situations or people. The biomedical conditions that, according to research in recent decades, cause erection problems are: alcohol and drug use, diabetes , vascular diseases, side effects of medications, circulatory problems, urological disorders …

Most of the men who come to the consultation for impotence problems prefer to think that its origin is organic. If so, there will be a short and comfortable treatment that will make this problem go away easily. With this, in addition, they avoid thinking that there may be a minimal probability of a psychological substrate at the origin of the dysfunction. Which they associate with some disturbance, madness, imbalance or with relationship problems. However, most cases of impotence have a psychological origin.

The reason, then, is anxiety that Masters and Johnson call acting anxiety and acting fear. Psychological causes cover a wide range of possible realities, both individual and as a couple.

How is it produced?

Sometimes the first episode of impotence is caused by an organic cause. However, it is later maintained despite the fact that the reason that originated it has disappeared. If the impossibility of penetration occurs only once and the subject internalizes it as being tired, alcohol … and in the following situations it is not repeated, he has not developed any dysfunction.

If, when the situation of lack of erection occurs, you feel like a failure, ridiculous and internalize the problem, you have a good chance of developing impotence dysfunction.

The next time all the worries about whether you can repeat the last time can overwhelm you so much that you again suffer some kind of inability either to get an erection or to keep it.

If, in addition, we avoid having sexual relations to avoid these problems and when we have them, anxiety overwhelms us so much that it prevents us from developing an adequate erection to be able to have intercourse, the process of evolution of impotence has already been completed.

What effects does it produce?

The consequences, without being fatal, can be dramatic. Some men, faced with the feeling of not being able to cure their impotence, reach high degrees of despair and even suicidal ideas.

It all depends on how both the man who suffers it and the partner, if any, approach it. In principle, with a psychological treatment there need not be a major problem.

Yes, there is when the man does not ask the specialist for help and continues to try it, encountering successive failed attempts, and thus, a feeling of failure that, if it is very strong, can be generalized to other areas of his life and not limited to the mere sexual field .

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On the other hand, if impotence occurs in a stable partner, it plays an important role. If, when the first failure occurs, you satirize it, blaming it, it may be causing a whole process of impotence. Relativizing what happened, attributing it to any cause other than the man himself can help.

Diagnosis of impotence

The first thing to do is eliminate the possibility that there is a physiological basis that could cause erection problems. If the patient is referred for the urologist’s consultation, this possibility is already eliminated. If you go directly to the psychologist, a medical report is necessary in this regard.

Once the organic base and the habits of alcohol and drug consumption have been discarded, it is convenient to refer to the first moment in which the problem began. You should identify all the antecedents, describe the thoughts that arose while it happened, and analyze the events and reactions that occurred afterwards.

Thus, the entire process of initiation of dysfunction can be established. Subsequently, the same procedure will be carried out with the relationships, or attempts, that occurred later. With this we will pick up the process of development of impotence.

It is convenient to take into account if it always occurs with the same person and not with others, in certain situations or different contexts and identify which of the possible psychological causes were those that triggered the whole process, and define whether, for example, depression is consequence of erection problems or vice versa.

Impotence treatment

Before analyzing one form of treatment, among many, it is convenient to draw attention to two aspects: one, that there is no single way of approaching dysfunction that works well for all patients; and another, that no treatment can ensure success.

The process discussed below is intended for those men whose impotence problems have no organic basis and are assigned to certain situations, contexts or people.

This treatment does not always require the collaboration of a woman, although in the end it is necessary. If the woman decides to cooperate, she should receive instructions from the therapist.
The objective is to increase the sexual arousal of the male, with sensory focus.

The man must remain passive, allowing himself to be done and verbalizing the sensations that the stimulation produces.

In the first moments, penetration is the least to think about. It is about making the man regain the confidence that his can get stiff again. When the erection remains stable, it tends to stop and restart it until the process of arousal and relaxation is normalized, as something natural.

Once a reliable erection has been achieved, for a certain time, the penis is played around the opening of the vagina but without penetration.

Subsequently, it goes to penetration but only a few centimeters to, only at the end, consummate the complete coital relationship.

Penetration should be done with the woman on top, initially still, and then move gently. After several repetitions she is allowed to conclude the act with orgasm. After this last stage is when the man is allowed to take a more active role in the sexual relationship and change position. The entire process of sensory targeting can be done by man himself without needing another person. However, in the final phases of the intervention, it is advisable to have the collaboration of a couple.

He must volunteer to maintain relationships in the right way to carry out the entire therapeutic process that allows eliminating the dysfunction.

When to go to the psychologist?

A specialist should be consulted when the sensation of erection failure occurs in a worrisome way for the man or his partner.

It should not be forgotten that sometimes what I tell myself are just justifications for the fear that impotence is basically a sign of my own incapacity.

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Hello Readers, I am Nikki Bella a Psychology student. I have always been concerned about human behavior and the mental processes that lead us to act and think the way we do. My collaboration as an editor in the psychology area of ​​Well Being Pole has allowed me to investigate further and expand my knowledge in the field of mental health; I have also acquired great knowledge about physical health and well-being, two fundamental bases that are directly related and are part of all mental health.

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