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Self-confidence: How to build and cultivate it day by day?

Self-confidence, as the word defines it well, is the power of confidence that each individual possesses over himself.

Having self-confidence means being able to see ourselves with an optimistic eye ; focus on seeing and understanding our positive capacities and expressing them in the way that best suits us. We well know that we cannot ignore that like every human being we also have our negative aspects and our weaknesses, that in fact with the same self-confidence we can improve those aspects that we dislike and strengthen our weaknesses.

People who have developed their great self-confidence skills are more insightful when it comes to solving unforeseen inconveniences or facing responsibilities; But self-confidence is a difficult skill to master, since if it is exceeded it can become an unfavorable and difficult weapon to control, which is why to achieve a high level of self-confidence it is extremely necessary to build our own self-control.

While self-confidence is something that not all individuals believe they have the ability to achieve, it can be achieved, and with a little effort, perseverance, and self-worth, anyone could start building and cultivating their own life today. self-confidence.

What factors affect the lack of self-confidence?

Since the psyche of the human being is fragile and fluctuating, there may be various factors that contribute to reducing the capacity for self-confidence, among them we can find:

Disapproval in childhood

People who were severely criticized and disapproved of in their childhood are more likely to suffer from a lack of self-confidence. This happens when, for example, a child is repeatedly criticized, either by their parents, teachers or caregivers, without taking into account the intentions or efforts of the child. An example of this case is the following: Juancito (a 5-year-old boy) tries to help his parents by starting to sweep the house (Juancito’s ability to sweep is not good, but he has the best intentions to help his parents). Then the parents disapprove of what he has done and criticize him for leaving places without sweeping or badly swept, at that moment Juancito feels disappointment, guilt and loses confidence in himself.

It must be understood that children have a very fragile psyche and any inappropriate criticism or comment can generate confusing feelings and alterations at the psyche level.

Conflict between authority figures

If parents or other authority figures fight or make each other feel bad, the child absorbs the negative emotions and mistrust situations that have been modeled for them.

When a child has been subjected to excessive conflict between authority figures, they may feel guilty and believe that the conflict or discussion is their fault . The child experiences these conflicts as disturbing and threatening situations . Usually these feelings and emotions carry over into adolescence and adulthood, manifesting as emotional insecurity and low self-esteem .

Overprotection by authority figures

If an individual suffers from overprotection during their childhood, they will be more prone to lack of self-confidence. This occurs when parents excessively and indiscriminately support their children, making decisions for them and preventing them from choosing and even limiting their thoughts.

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Usually people who were overprotected in childhood experience emotional ups and downs, mood swings, emotional insecurity , low self-esteem, and emotional dependence . For this reason, it is not healthy for children for parents to overprotect them excessively, since overprotection can limit different capacities and make them lose security and choice.

How to build and enhance self-confidence?

In principle, to build self-confidence we must take into account and observe the way in which we see ourselves and our environment with respect to us.

Begin to see and focus on each of our positive qualities , believe in yourself and feel in harmony and at ease with who you are is one of the first steps to gain confidence in yourself.

Another fundamental pillar when it comes to having confidence in ourselves is self-knowledge : knowing ourselves better, analyzing our thoughts and emotions . The analysis of our emotions and thoughts gives us an inner vision of what we are and what we want to achieve; There it is that without realizing it, self-confidence plays a fundamental role.

We build our self-confidence when proposing achievements and goals in life, since without having confidence in ourselves, most of our projects and achievements would fail; That is why we clearly see how self-confidence is essential if we want to obtain what we propose and achieve our goals.

It is important to be clear about our purposes in life, to focus on our aspirations ; understand what we want to achieve, what we want to be and what we want to achieve.

Having our purposes fixed encourages us to fight for them and work to carry them out; and if we have been able to build self-confidence, that path to achievement will open little by little, continuously, which makes it more likely that our goals will be successful.

If we want to enhance our self-confidence, it is necessary to start implementing our own self-discipline ; This consists, in principle, in beginning to change our behaviors and attitudes, proposing challenges to improve and even sometimes, if necessary, change our perspectives and maintain a certain pressure on ourselves so that these small and at the same time enormous changes are not simple words that vanish, and if they are put into practice.

By cultivating our self-confidence, it helps us improve those negative parts that we see in ourselves and learn from them; But for this it is necessary to have a high level of self-criticism and acceptance, accepting both the good and the bad things that happen to us every day.

It is known that self-confidence does not arise overnight, but takes time and dedication; But if we dedicate a little that time and a little effort to it often, with a little patience, we can see that the advantages of having confidence will gradually emerge. Those changes that lead us to obtain self-confidence will not only be positive, but will also show us a more positive vision of life, of ourselves and also help us to have a better management of our interpersonal relationships, so that they are healthier. and nourished.

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Hello Readers, I am Nikki Bella a Psychology student. I have always been concerned about human behavior and the mental processes that lead us to act and think the way we do. My collaboration as an editor in the psychology area of ​​Well Being Pole has allowed me to investigate further and expand my knowledge in the field of mental health; I have also acquired great knowledge about physical health and well-being, two fundamental bases that are directly related and are part of all mental health.

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